Working Through a Major Life Transition
Life is full of ups and downs, twists and turns, and realizing that things don’t always go as perfectly as you would have liked. In fact, for every well thought out plan that actually does come to fruition, there are a million other plans that went totally sideways. In fact, if you really look at how that well thought out plan did turn out, there are likely things that came up that you had to adjust too.
There are million and one reasons that things don’t always happen the way that we would like. The ability adapt and adjust, is critical, because let’s face it, sometimes things just happen that we have no control over. As much as we try to dictate how our existence is going to unfold on this planet, we can’t always account for the unknown or the unexpected. So when something out of left field does suddenly show up, it may knock us sideways temporarily or cause us to pause and re-evaluate our situation, but ultimately it molds and shapes us into who we are and who we are becoming.
These type of life changes help build resiliency, which is a critical part of our ability to keep moving forward even in the face of tremendous adversity or trying circumstances. Being resilient builds confidence and self-esteem; knowing that we have the ability to adapt and overcome what life throws at us, goes a long way to living a life full of contentment and happiness. Remember, just because things aren’t going exactly according to plan, doesn’t mean that it still can’t be amazing. It’s all in how you look at yourself and how you decide not to become a victim of your circumstances but rather a thriver in the face of difficult odds.
Perhaps you had an unexpected change in your living situation, and now that nice little cottage with the white picket fence turns out to be an apartment in the city. Or that nice apartment downtown that allowed you to be close to everything you enjoy, is now a home in the country and the closest town is a 30 minute drive each way.
- That nice convertible that you worked so hard for and always wanted, has to be sold and now you’re driving a minivan.
- Going out to eat all the time has transitioned into eating low cost, easy to prepare meals at home.
- Those designer clothes are gone and you no longer afford to be on the cutting edge of fashion.
- You and your spouse would come and go as you please, maybe you traveled all the time, and had money to burn…and now you’re on a budget and trying to figure out how to take a weekend getaway now and then.
- Your company has downsized and suddenly a two person income family is down to just one and the numbers don’t crunch well.
- You had to drop out of college to take care of a loved one, or deal with a death in the family, and suddenly all of your dreams seem more like a distant memory rather than a road map to the future you’ve always wanted.
- Your son or daughter is leaving for college and you begin to feel like, “well now what do I do”?
There are a million and one things that can change, even in the blink of an eye, and handling what life throws at you can be a daunting task. Whether you are single or have someone by your side, the whole idea of figuring out life can cause a great deal of stress.
Enter…a Life Transition Coach.
As a Coach, I’m here to help you figure out who you are, where you are, and make sense of what’s happening. All of those things that seemingly went “wrong”, and now cause you to think “can I handle this? I just don’t know what to do or where to start….” can be a major cause of stress. You stay up late at night worrying, calculating, adjusting, and wake up the next morning feeling more exhausted than the night before.
You can longer be fully present with your spouse or family, and you can’t enjoy life the way that you used too. Your relationships at home, work, and at play, are suffering and maybe you find yourself just not doing anything at all because it just seems too overwhelming. You feel totally confused and wonder just what happened to get you where you are now, and what you did wrong.
- What would it look like to have someone who can help you make sense of it all?
- To talk with someone who will listen, be fully present, and totally focused on you?
- Someone who can give you objective insight?
- A person who can help you see yourself, not as a person who failed or is destined to be a victim or circumstance?
- An advocate who can help you gain some perspective and put a plan together to adjust, and make the best of what’s happening now and what’s coming?
Yes, we do have to deal with the trials of life, and expect the unexpected, but that doesn’t mean that we have to just accept that we can’t live a full and satisfying life. It doesn’t mean that we have to give up on our dreams. The goals that we set long ago don’t have a thing of the past. Maybe you need to adjust a bit, sure, but there in lies tremendous opportunity for personal growth!
Resiliency my friend, that what life transition is all about. Recognize, Adapt, and Move Forward.
You can be that person you’ve always wanted to be. You don’t have to be a victim of your past or present circumstances. You can survive and thrive, and wake up each day embracing the possibilities instead of dreading what you see as inevitable. Take your life back!
-Matt Pappas, CLC