3 Reasons Why Anxiety Keeps You Stuck, and How to Overcome it!
How many times have you said something like this to yourself, or heard someone else say: “I’m just an anxious person by nature, it’s all I know”, “I’ve always been anxious about everything in life, I can’t ever just relax”, or “I was born this way and that’s all there is to it”.
If this sounds like you, well then you’re not alone. As cliché as that statement may be, it really is true. Anxiety is something that millions of people struggle with every single day. I’ve spent a good portion of my life dealing with it, and for a long time I just resigned myself to the idea that things were never going to change. Every day I would wake up and dread what was coming, I would over analyze and blow every situation completely out of proportion because it’s all I knew. That’s how I dealt with life, if I felt anxious about something, then at least I was preparing for what was coming and I was in control…or so I thought.
Anxiety can take over your life, and can define how you see yourself if you let it. That’s the key right there my friend, “if you let it”. Anxiety only has the power that you allow it to have. The sooner we realize and embrace that, the sooner we start to see anxiety for what it is…a liar!
My guest on this episode of the Beyond Your Past Podcast is someone who’s dedicated her life to helping everyone see anxiety for what it truly is, and overcome it. To empower them with the knowledge that not only is anxiety a liar, but also to equip them with skills to take their life back and live free from it’s grip.
In her work as a Psychotherapist, Jodi Aman has helped people in the areas of: Anxiety, depression, divorce, chronic pain, illness, eating disorders, abuse trauma, gender identity, relationship issues, as well as military/war trauma. She’s also an author of, “You 1 Anxiety 0, Win Your Life Back From Fear and Panic“. This incredible resource has helped countless people all over the world realize that there is hope in the fight against anxiety.
Not only is Jodi an author and therapist, but she also has an extensive library of videos on her You Tube channel. She covers everything from learning how to love yourself, to overcoming fear, meditation, self-confidence, and so much more. Her videos and Facebook Live chats give you easy to use tips and strategies that you can use in everyday life as you learn to overcome anxiety and embrace the person that you’ve always wanted to be.
It’s no secret that I’m a fan of Jodi’s work, because it’s been life changing for me and for so many people across the world. I use many of the techniques that she shares in my own life and in my work with clients in my coaching practice.
The main topic of our chat centers around the question of, “is anxiety curable?”…and the short answer is a resounding, YES! We discuss the 3 reasons why anxiety is indeed curable, why so many feel that it isn’t and the reasons why anxiety keeps them stuck. By the way, that’s precisely what it wants you to believe, that there is no cure for anxiety and that it’s a life sentence of misery, isolation, depression, and living in fear. (hint..that’s yet another lie).
So why exactly do so many think that there is no cure? Well, one reason is because someone told you that it wasn’t, so therefore you believe it. There are some mental health professionals and coaches that believe there is no cure; that you can only work to manage it, but not completely overcome it. If that’s your mindset then it becomes exponentially more difficult to try to make any type of positive change. If you feel like there’s no hope, no end goal of healing and feeling better, it’s very easy to not work as hard or just give up completely. You eventually begin to define yourself in every negative way possible, so therefore trying to embrace any hope of healing is darn near impossible. Then you emotionally beat yourself up because your stuck, miserable, broken and alone. It’s a vicious cycle to say the least.
Another reason is that it’s just so easy to stay still and not even try. Staying isolated and alone at home, seemingly safe from the outside world, seems like the better option. You no longer go to work, stop going out with friends, and decide that you aren’t capable of reaching out for support. It’s all to easy to develop such a negative view of our ability to cope, and we figure we’re better off alone so we don’t set ourselves up for more failure.
The third reason is that you’ve tried everything to cure your anxiety and you still don’t like yourself. You still don’t feel like you’ve made any progress, like this whole idea of beating anxiety is a pipe dream and you simply aren’t capable enough to pull it off. The key here friends is…
You Cannot Cure Your Anxiety and Not Like Yourself.
You have to address how YOU feel about YOU and make peace with that. You have to love yourself, give yourself a break, encourage yourself, be your own best advocate. Nobody is going to cure the anxiety in your life, but you, and if you don’t believe in yourself, you’ll never accomplish it. You’ll stay stuck, miserable, isolated, and alone; spinning out and living in fear. On top of that, you’re constantly beating yourself up because you experience those very things.
Instead of hating yourself and constantly minimizing who you are and what you’re capable of, decide to make a positive change…one step at a time. Allow yourself to embrace that idea that you are capable, resilient, and powerful; that you have what it takes to beat anxiety instead of it beating you.
We cover these 3 reasons more in-depth on the podcast, so you’ll definitely want to give it a listen! Plus, we discuss some strategies that you can put in place to help empower you right away!
In addition to all of this, we cover topics such as:
- Is there a biological part to anxiety?
- Is there actually a purpose for anxiety in your life, and is some anxiety actually good?
- How anxiety plays off of fear, and why common sense can help alleviate that.
The key takeaway here is, that beating anxiety is doable, it’s very doable…but it takes practice. It takes a mindset of being tired of the status quo of misery, and embracing your potential. It’s just like anything in life, whether it comes naturally to you or not, you still need to practice. Working daily on your own behalf to overcome anxiety, leads to empowerment and resiliency. You have to want to do it, and you have to believe that you can do it.
It still doesn’t mean that everything is going to be easy; that you’ll never have a tough day, or that anxiety will just give up and stop trying to get a hold of you. It doesn’t mean that things from the past won’t try to creep up again and that every day will be peachy keen. Sometimes life just happens, but it’s how we approach it and learn from it, that makes all the difference.
What it does mean though, is that you are sick and tired of being anxious and you are choosing to take positive action on your own behalf. You are no longer going to define yourself by your anxiety, but rather by your resiliency. You are refusing to stay stuck and alone and dreading what’s coming. It means that you are choosing to empower yourself, and that each time anxiety tries to take over, you’ll be better prepared to handle it. Each day will get a little bit easier and your confidence will increase, your self-esteem will increase, and as you continue taking your life back, you’ll see the scales finally tipped back in your favor. The power that anxiety once had is gone, and now YOU have it.
Thank you so much Jodi for joining me on the podcast and sharing your insight and encouragement so we can all finally discover what it means to live free from anxiety!
-Matt Pappas, CLC
If you’d like more information on working with a certified life coach, or if you have questions about how working with a life coach might be right for you… go for it and schedule your free intro session! Always remember, You Are Worth It, and there is hope for moving forward from what holds you back.